– I received a free copy in exchange for an honest review. –
To be published by Wednesday Books on 07 Apr 2020
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Fifteen-year-old JL Markham’s life used to be filled with carnival nights and hot summer days spent giggling with her forever best friend Aubrey about their families and boys. Together, they were unstoppable. But they aren’t the friends they once were.
With JL’s father gone on long term business, and her mother struggling with her mental illness, JL takes solace in the tropical butterflies she raises, and in her new, older boyfriend, Max Gordon. Max may be rough on the outside, but he has the soul of a poet (something Aubrey will never understand). Only, Max is about to graduate, and he’s going to hit the road – with or without JL.
JL can’t bear being left behind again. But what if devoting herself to Max not only means betraying her parents, but permanently losing the love of her best friend? What becomes of loyalty, when no one is loyal to you?
(Thanks Dad for sending me a picture of a butterfly to edit and use. I now have a new appreciation for all the photos you take of butterflies, birds, and flowers.)
No, you do not need to know anything about Jack Kerouac to follow this story. The only thing I knew about him was that he wrote On the Road, and I couldn’t even tell you what it’s about! I have a hard time reading classics, so I love contemporary takes. However, Kerouac doesn’t play a big role in this story, and the only thing I learned about him was that his birth name was Jean-Louis, after which JL was named, as JL’s mom and nana have an obsession with him. It’s possible that I may have missed some symbolism regarding Kerouac, but it didn’t take anything away from my reading experience.
And, yet, it isn’t about me, suddenly. It’s what you have decided. You have judged me as one thing, and at some point, I will disappoint you by proving you wrong.
This coming-of-age story follows JL as she grapples with the different relationships in her life: family, best friend, first love. The whimsy and romance of youth was given some edge by unexpectedly heavy themes, and the heavy themes were made accessible with the lighter tone.
A major theme in the book was sexual exploration. JL’s candour about this was refreshing. But exploring this beautiful part of human nature doesn’t come without some challenges. On one hand, JL faced being slut shamed by her best friend (who knew being called a slutty butterfly could be so traumatic lol), and on the other hand, she also had to contend with the pressure to have sex by her older boyfriend. The juxtaposition of these conflicts made rich ground for exploration, but I don’t think the conversation reached its full potential, as the end was too rushed and tidy, leaving much unresolved.
Growing up is hard. Women undergo so much scrutiny. We’re criticised for being too much and not enough. Navigating this is an ongoing process. Fighting this is an ongoing process. It’s a lot to tackle for anyone, let alone a high school sophomore like JL. Who wouldn’t get a bit angsty?
A last note: A minor theme was mental illness, which I didn’t think was treated with as much care as it could have been. I think diving deeper into the theme of sexual exploration would have been enough.